# Defense Against the Woke Arts: A Guide To Teach Kids how to Defeat Transgender Ideology Written By: SilentActGreat Originally Published: 12-30-2022 >  ## **Introduction: How We Perceive Girls and boys** *What does it mean to be a boy? *What does it mean to be a girl?* These are questions that for the longest time throughout, most boys and girls have never really had to think too hardly about, not as kids, nor as adults. Those especially from the Baby Boomer era and Generation X, and earlier, had the luxury of living their childhoods and most of their adulthood, without ever having the creeping spectre of transgender ideology challenging their boyhood or girlhood. >  >  Throughout generations, we are taught that an easy way to define and conceptualize boys and girls are based on gender roles, or gender stereotypes, of general patterns of what they do, or what we *think* they should do. Take for example the, 1970 children's book "I'm Glad I'm a Boy! I'm Glad I'm a Girl!" By Whitney Darrow Jr. Boys fix things. Girls need things fixed. Boys are strong. Girls are graceful. Boys have trucks. Girls have dolls. We typically call these gender roles and stereotypes as *masculinity* for males, and *femininity* for females. Traits and characteristics typically strongly associated with males are masculine, and traits typically strongly associated with females are feminine. We have also typically been taught for generations, both in our culture and in many other cultures through history, that boys and men are *supposed* to be masculine, and women are *supposed* to be feminine, often to a point where deviation results in punishment. > "Be watchful, stand firm in the faith, **act like men**, **be strong**." > – 1 Corinthians 16:13, KJV > "\[That they may **teach the young women**\]…**to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands**, that the word of God may not be reviled." > – Titus 2:5, KJV For the most part, this is what we and most cultures have worked with and abided by since the dawn of civilization. Men are supposed to be a set of desired characteristics in men, like "strong, fixes things, plays with trucks", (masculine) while women are supposed to be a set of desired characteristics in women, like "pure, kind, plays with dolls" (feminine), and any deviation from this is unacceptable. Like the verse from Titus 2:5 says, most cultures throughout history consider the failure to abide by such gender roles/stereotypes as grave sins, and such individuals often get shunned, outcasted, or otherwise greatly punished and demonized. They're branded as "heathens", "degenerates", "abominations", "homosexuals", and many other such slurs. Regardless of whether one believes that men should be a certain set of "masculine" traits, or women should be a certain set of "feminine" traits, there are several facts of reality that has to be acknowledged: 1. Not all men will be masculine, and not all women will be feminine, whether by lack of ability, or lack of desire to. 2. Not all men will be able to fit most or all of the masculinity expectations, and not all women will be able to fit most or all of the femininity expectations. 3. Many men will sometimes feel like they do not fit in with other men, and many women will sometimes feel like they do not fit in with other women. 4. Many men and women will not always feel comfortable or confident 100% of the time being a man or woman as their biological sex. Fueled by the cultures' desire to demonize and punish those who end up falling into those above categories, these areas are where transgender ideology has recently come in during these past few decades and made its move. It tries to convince children that everything in their life can be explained by them being trans. It tries to convince them and their parents that they NEED to undergo medical transition or else they'll likely commit suicide, based on the fake and over-inflated and purposefully misrepresented "41% trans-suicide" statistic. And if the parents still protest, they deem the parents to pose harm and risk to the child, saying that their nnoncompliance with transgender medical transitioning is putting the children at risk of suicide. To understand how to teach your children to combat transgender ideology, first we need to know *what* exactly its ideology teaches to kids and HOW it convinces them. **How The Transgender Ideology Woke Arts Operates**  ==The Genderbread Person== As seen on teaching material such as "The Genderbread Person", THE primary cornerstone concept of transgender ideology is the concept of "**Gender Identity**". In nearly all official sources, Gender Identity basically means "**how you think and feel about yourself**". Specifically, it refers to whether you *feel* like what you believe in your mind to be "boy/man", "girl/woman", or in some cases "neither" (also known as "non-binary"). According to transgender ideology, the official definition of "transgender" means: someone whose gender identity, or their ***feeling and perception of themselves*** as a boy, girl, or neither_,_ is different from what their biological sex and body parts indicate. But what sort of things would transgender ideology teach to kids to make themselves *feel or believe* they are something different from their biological sex? ## **Part I: *Masculinity IS Male, and Femininity IS Female*** As "gender identity" asserts, "boy" and "girl" aren't matters of biological characteristics, but rather "*how you think* *and feel* *about yourself*", one wonders what does it mean to "*feel like a boy*" or "*feel like a girl*"? The reality is of course, there's no such objective provable thing that one can "*feel like a girl*". Every man reading this right now knows there is no such "feeling like a man" circulating in their mind right now, and every woman reading this knows there's no such "feeling like a woman" circulating in their mind either. More specifically, since this is about children, what would children think it means in their minds, to "feel" like a boy or girl, if it's from something that is not biology and body parts? The other thing that is closely tied and linked with being male and female: masculinity and femininity and its stereotypes. Other than biological body parts, the other primary thing that we teach children (and have taught for generations) regarding what boys and girls are, are gender roles/stereotypes. These are all things that the kids themselves see and observe in boys and girls too. Things such as for example: Boys are those people who are rowdy and play with trucks and do sports. Girls are those people who are graceful and play with dolls and do ballet. Alternatively, they may observe or be educated, to think conversely as well: Trucks, sports, rowdiness, etc. are "boy things". Ballet, dolls, gracefulness, etc. are "girl things". Even adults will sometimes refer to these various activities or characteristics as either "boy things" or "girl things". And there is some truth to that, in that they are things that boys or girls can do or have. The problem, though, is that transgender ideology also abuses our strong connection and link of masculinity and femininity to biological sex, as well. >  We say to boys that **part** of being a boy is being masculine, and these various traits and characteristics like "plays with trucks" associated with it. Transgender ideology takes that a step further to say that **masculinity itself** **IS****being a boy** or man. The same is true with femininity, by saying that **femininity IS synonymous with being a girl**, rather than simply part of being a girl. Boys play with trucks. Girl play with dolls. "But I like playing with trucks and hate dolls," says the daughter. "Why *would* I like trucks…unless I was a boy?" she might think. "Yes, inside you know you *feel like a boy*. You wanting to play with these 'boy things' proves you feel like a boy inside", trans-ideology would say. "But I do like certain other girl things too like dancing…" the girl might also think. "Then you may actually just be *non-binary",* trans ideology would say. You may just not feel like a boy or a girl and are different and special entirely. But as a generalization, boys *are* masculine and like 'boy things', and girls *are* feminine and like feminine things. So as long as you teach your sons to be masculine, and your daughters to be feminine, then it shouldn't be a problem because they won't ever "feel like the opposite sex", right? Not exactly. >  "For example, an AMAB (male) trans person may find themselves very uncomfortable in groups of men. They **may feel out of place and struggle to fit in among their male peers. Masculine social interactions don't come naturally to them**, and trying to emulate their male friends feels awkward. They may feel themselves drawn more to friendships with women, but become frustrated at the social and heterosexual dynamics that come into play between men and women, preventing them from forming platonic relationships. This is if women are willing to form friendships at all. They may find themselves deeply hurt when women shy away from them on principle. **This feeling of wrongness intensifies** as the person becomes more and more aware of their own incongruence, and upon realizing who they really are it takes on a new shape. For binary trans people, **this often may be about the intense need to be seen as your true gender, be it male or female.**" [From "The Gender Dysphoria Bible"](https://archive.ph/8rUEk) Transgender ideology asserts that "cisgender" people (aka, not transgender people) are always 100% fully comfortable and happy being the biological sex they were born as, which is why they have no internal feelings or feeling like the opposite sex. Not only does transgender ideology assert that showing the opposite sex's gender stereotypes as a "sign of trans", and a "desire to be seen as their true gender", it ALSO asserts that *failure to adhere* to ANY sort of gender stereotypes associated with your biological sex, is also a "sign of trans". Naturally, almost no boy or girl will be 100% perfect masculine or feminine and fit every gender stereotype. And also, many boys and girls will also have feelings of being out of place with their peers too, with either their fellow boys, fellow girls, or both. These are the things which trans-ideology preys on. ## **Part II: If You Have Any Doubt You're Trans, You're trans** >  >  As previously mentioned, transgender ideology asserts that all "cisgender" (not-transgender) people are 100% secure and comfortable with their biological sex, and never question or wonder what it's like to be the opposite sex. So if you've ever had any sort of fleeting thoughts or curiosity of what it's like being the opposite sex, you're trans, so says trans-ideology. ## Part III: Awkward Puberty is also a Sign of Being Trans (Special note: This part of trans-ideology typically doesn't come into play until pubescent age and after) >  > Memes for Reddit's r/egg\_irl, a Subreddit for "memes about trans people in denial" Puberty is one of the most awkward and uncomfortable time periods for children. For the most part, this article has assumed that the children in question are pre-pubescent. However, nearly every adult man and woman reading this article probably felt the pain and discomfort of going through puberty. The body is changing in ways that you can't understand or control, and your brain is feeling weird sexual feelings that you can't understand or control either. It was something we all had to deal with and eventually come to terms with, and accept that it was a *normal* part of life. And once again, trans-ideology comes to prey on this uncomfortability and confusion kids feel with their developing bodies and sexuality with its own grooming and brainwashing. Are you a pubescent boy who feels uncomfortable about his testicles dropping? That's because you might actually be a girl in the wrong body. Are you a pubescent girl who feels uncomfortable about her breasts developing? That's because you might actually be a boy in the wrong body. Although there is large overlap between these body issues felt both by boys and girls, this next part will be split up into two sections, one which is typically more strongly associated with boys, and one which is typically more strongly associated with girls. ## **Part IIIa: Boys and Autogynephilia** >  A surprisingly large amount of heterosexual males who are attracted to females, from Caitlyn Jenner and his multiple wives, to Chris Chan raping his mother, have a sexual fetish where they are so attracted to and obsessed with females/femininity, that they wish to turn themselves into their own object of sexual attraction. This fetish is known as [**autogynephilia**](https://archive.ph/o/djXx6/https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/22005209/), and it is **one of the most common** underlying causes for **sexually mature heterosexual boys** to believe they are actually a "girl", or wish to become "girls". Approximately 83% of MtFs are autogynephiles. > "Growing up as a closeted trans teen in an evangelical Christian household, I knew that if I was ever caught **looking at women in what was seen as a sexual manner**, I would be punished. I knew if I was ever found handling women's apparel, there would be a lot of very awkward questions which I was not prepared to answer. This posed a very serious problem for me, as someone **with a strong fascination with women's apparel, particularly lingerie**. Out of shame and fear, I did everything I could to hide this passion, because I simply could not bear for someone to view me **like the teenage boys who masturbate to any material they get their hands on**. What made this fear even worse was that I *also believed* that my interest was sexual." From ["The Gender Dysphoria Bible"](https://archive.is/20220830093610/https://genderdysphoria.fyi/en/sexual-dysphoria) A commonly held misconception is that these types of boys fascinated with female/feminine things, such as cross dressing, are simply homosexuals who like other males. While there certainly are homosexual males who participate in cross dressing, in reality, the vast majority of these cross dressing boys are actually heterosexual autogynephiles, whom express NO sexual attraction to other males, and have almost the same sexual attraction towards females as most other heterosexual males do (this is why Caitlyn Jenner had multiple ex-wives and no relationships with any male partners). The female analog, where a girl is sexually aroused at the thought of being a male, is autoandrophilia, although it is far less common. ## **Part IIIb: Girls and Escape From Womanhood** >  > From Reddit's detransition subreddit r/detrans In contrast to most boys typically being motivated by sexual reasons such as that of autogynephilia, the majority of girls who find themselves wanting to become "boys", seem to be moreso around the various social stigmas surrounding being a female and characteristics associated with females (femininity). For girls, it isn't necessarily only just the fact that they're not "feminine" or fit into characteristics considered as "feminine". Often their experiences have made them believe that femininity itself, and what femininity itself requires them to do as girls/women, is harmful to them and their entire being. It is no secret that society does indeed put lots of expectations and ideals on to women. Regardless of whether or not they're considered fair or moral or just, there are many girls/women who would probably think that it isn't fair or good for them to expected to be things like cleaners and cooks as their "rightful place" as girls/women. Thus they view womanhood (or whatever societal impressions of womanhood she believes) as well as BEING FEMALE is itself undesirable and "wrong", and they seek to become "boys" in order to avoid being female something they view as more or less being an awful fate itself. What makes this aspect of societal expectations and stigma around women/femininity even more awful, is that this doesn't just apply to masculine or nonconforming girls. It affects even girls who may be innately "feminine" in their nature and cause them to become disillusioned at the idea of simply BEING feminine/female. Sometimes, to become desperate enough to seek becoming "not female", even. ***The Lies and Manipulation of "41% Trans-Suicide"*** >  > [Source](https://archive.is/20230120041800/https://www.buzzfeed.com/skarlan/i-am-jazz) Within the current mainstream culture, there is a narrative pushed by woke activism influencing both mainstream media and medicine/healthcare about the so-called "suicide epidemic" of transgender individuals, with the number often cited as "41%". The problem of course, is that the transgender-suicide narrative, is at best, a deceptive manipulation, and at worst, a flat out lie. The deceit and lies surrounding the transgender suicide narrative is enough to warrant its own separate dedicated and detailed essay in of itself. However, to try and keep it as factual yet brief as necessary, the most key and important points will be outlined. For reference, the popularly referenced "41% transgender suicide" statistic comes from a 2011 Report from the National Transgender Discrimination Survey: [https://transequality.org/sites/default/files/docs/resources/NTDS\_Report.pdf](https://archive.ph/o/djXx6/https://transequality.org/sites/default/files/docs/resources/NTDS_Report.pdf) Firstly, the 41% stat itself **isn't even referencing trans individuals**, not entirely at least. >  In the survey's first question, it asks for people that are transgender/"gender non-conforming". The key word is "gender non-conforming", which refers to be people who "don't conform to gender norms", meaning things like **feminine males and tomboy girls** who may not necessarily think of themselves as transgender or being the opposite sex. The authors of the report themselves admit that the survey **included people who were not transgender**. Which means not only that the number was inflated, but in of itself arguably invalidates and possible conclusions that could be drawn about either transgender or gender non-conforming groups individually. Even if we were to assume that the number itself was not invalid, there is one more important point that should be highlighted: >  Aside from the fact that the numbers themselves are inflated/fraudulent with not-transgender people, and aside from the fact that it refers to *attempted* suicide, (which is a literal life & death difference from actual suicide), the more salient point is the fact that for the most part, there is no real analysis for WHY or what specific reason they may want to consider suicide. If one were to ask 100 hypothetical individuals of any X group, say, white people or black people, and 41 of them were to say they attempted suicide, what would still be missing is why those 41 people want to attempt suicide. Because they're white? Because of financial issues? Because of relationship issues? Going back to transgender individuals and whatever reasons they have for contemplating suicide, it too could also be for any number of potential possible reasons not necessarily related to their transgender status. However, the woke narrative wants people to assume the suicide-thought reasons are: - Transphobia/Discrimination of transgender status - Failure to receive affirmative transgender medicine to affirm their trans identities >  From GenderGP: <https://www.gendergp.com/what-is-the-transgender-suicide-rate/> Dr. Wong admits to advising kids to threaten suicide to coerce parents and/or health services: >  The woke narrative is that if your child believes themselves to be transgender, or is diagnosed as transgender by some so-called professional, then they will claim that it is in the child's best interest to transition and undergo hormone treatment and/or surgery, and to do it as soon as possible, or else risk condemning them to suicide. Naturally, this suicide narrative is meant to scare and coerce both children and their parents into seeing medical transition as their only option (or risk suiciding), should the children exhibit any sort of characteristics that can be considered as "transgender". Many good-hearted parents, who may not know any better, might agree to it because they legitimately do want the best for their children and "trust the experts" have their best interests at heart too. Many other parents who don't want their children to undergo what is essentially a medical experiment at best, and child abuse at worst, can potentially have their parental rights overruled by courts and legal means, because pro-transgender activists and organizations can claim the parents are putting their children at harm and pushing them to suicide. **Transitioning Doesn't Help (and how they make you think it does)** As one can probably expect, the narrative that medical transitioning decreases their desire for suicide is also filled with more half-truths and pseudo-scientific lies as well. >  > <https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/25487762/> Again, all the flaws of transgender pseudo-science and medicine are so expansive that they can be a dissertation topic in their own right, but the main and easiest ones will be elaborated in the most necessarily informative yet concise way possible. The main problem with the vast majority of these pro-transition studies that try to push the narrative that medical transition is beneficial to transgender people, whether in decreasing their suicidality or general quality of life, are **not long-term** and typically only follow-up their patients for **1-5 years** at max after their transition. Why does this matter, one might wonder? Say you have a hypothetical situation and person named "Taylor", a biological male. - "Taylor" decides that he is transgender in the year 2019. - In 2020 he transitions to "female". - In 2022, researchers conduct a survey if he's happy about his transition. He is happy. - In 2026, he starts to feel feelings of regret and no longer likes his transition. At this point in 2026 and onwards, it no longer matters – researchers already counted him as a success when they conducted their study in 2022. After that, **he is just "anecdotal evidence" and his regret no longer counts**. This is part of how transgender pseudo-science purposely manipulates its data and design to produce biased data. As indicated by the previous study from *Hess et.* *a__l (2014),* the longer time goes on, the more likely they are to experience feeling of regret. Naturally, everyone is *initially* happy with whatever decisions they make, but they do not necessarily *retain* said feelings of happiness as time goes on. They are more likely to drop-out as time goes on, and those individuals that dropped are most likely to be unsatisfied subjects who ghosted the researchers, which is why **less than half** the original subjects still remained. This is one of the natural biases in surveys – the ones who are likely to respond are more likely to be positive in nature, while the negative ones will probably just ignore and ghost you. With all this in mind, and with mainstream culture and even medical organizations and media out to groom kids with woke transgender ideology, what are some things that parents can do to combat it? ### **For Parents – How to Have a Discussion With Your Children** *Isolation and separation are not the only answers* Before I get into the specific things that you as a parent and mentor can do with your children, I'd like to talk about the following two points typically lauded as solutions: - Taking kids out of public school and/or homeschooling - Restricting your kids' access to the internet and social media While it IS true that you should do your best to prevent your kids from being exposed to harmful and damaging ideology, there are a couple of problems with simply isolating your children and calling it a day. As said on approx 33:15 of this [video](https://archive.ph/o/djXx6/https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5HbPzJy9gkY) by detransitioner Helena Kirschner: <iframe title="A Story Of Detransitioning | Michael Knowles" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/5HbPzJy9gkY?feature=oembed" height="113" width="200" allowfullscreen="" allow="fullscreen" style="aspect-ratio: 1.76991 / 1; width: 100%; height: 100%;"></iframe> > "*I think a lot of parents reflexively think the solution is to just ban all social media, and while I think that's really well intended, these kids are more intuitively able to get around that. They're better at using social media than you are, they will get around it, so just like to protect your kids from someone in the real world, you wouldn't ban them from ever talking to anybody, period. You would talk to them about who their friends are, and get to know what they're doing, and what they're thinking about, and who they're friends with. You should approach social media in a similar way.*" The biggest problem with transgender ideology lies in the fact that it exists in far more pervasive and less obvious ways than the obvious grooming propaganda seen in classrooms and in media. It is nearly inevitable that your children will encounter transgender ideology at some point in their lives, perhaps from another one of their friends or peers talking about it, or sharing an innocent meme about it (e.g. "Do you like playing as girl characters in videogames even though you're a boy? You're probably trans!). It is simply unfeasible to helicopter parent your children for the rest of their lives, hoping that they'll never be exposed to the ideas of transgender ideology. Like Helena says, it's like preventing them from ever talking to any other person to try and protect them from potential groomers. Not only is it unfeasible, it also leaves them sheltered in a way that makes them unable to handle the dangers of the real world. And like Helena says, the real solution lies in **talking with your kids and taking an interest in what they're thinking and doing.** ### **The Core Talking Points to counter transgender-ideology:** So let's say that the worst has happened and you suspect that your son or daughter believes themselves to be transgender. Given the numerous possible ways in which transgender ideology tries to groom children, one of the best ways is to **g****et them to question their own logic**. Some of the first things you can ask them: - **Why do you think that you are transgender and actually the opposite sex?** - **What do you think it means to be a boy or a girl?** - **What makes you do or DON'T fit the meaning of a boy or girl?** - **Why do you wish you were the opposite sex?** - **Do you think that it's possible for these feelings/traits to exist in other boys/girls, while still being their original biological sex?** Earlier, we talked about some of the most common ways that trans-ideology tries to convince your child that they're trans. Essentially, trans-ideology says to your children: > "*Here* *are the ways that boys and girls how are supposed to be, and here are all the ways why you don't__fit in with* *one and more like the other* *(or neither)*" So some of the most common ways they might answer you include: - They just "feel" like they're the opposite sex - They exhibit traits or enjoy activities typically associated with the opposite sex (e.g. playing with dolls, painting nails, lifting weights) - They don't feel comfortable around, or they feel "different" compared to other boys or other girls like themselves - They feel uncomfortable about their own bodies or parts of their bodies - They feel sexually aroused imagining being opposite sex (this one they'll likely never directly admit to) So what are some of the things you can talk to your kids about, and taking an interest in what they're thinking and doing, so that they themselves will become resilient to trans-ideology? 1. **There's no such thing as "feeling like a boy/girl".** Ask your son if he has some mystical "boy" feeling circulating in his mind telling him he's a boy. Ask your daughter if she has some mystical "girl" feeling circulating in her mind telling her she's a girl. Ask them if they have some kind of mystical "human" feeling in their brain telling them they're a human. *We do not have any sort of mystical feelings in our brain that constantly remind us about what we are*. As their mother, you can probably easily tell them that you have no such "girl" feeling in your brain telling yourself that you're a girl. As their father, you can probably easily tell them that you have no such "boy" feeling in your brain telling yourself that you're a boy. Additionally, whatever sort of "feeling" they might believe to feel is just something our minds makes up and imagines. It is impossible for a girl to "feel like a boy", if even actual boys don't know what "feeling like a boy" means, and vice versa for girls and "feeling like a girl". 1. **You cannot be** **"more of a boy/girl" or "less of a boy/girl****.** Every boy in existence is equally as much of a boy as every other boy, and every girl in existence is equally as much of a girl as every other girl. Between a "boyish" boy and a "girly" boy, both are equally as much boys as the other. Between a "girly" girl and a "boyish" girl, both are also equally as much girls as the other. It's important for our sons to know that they are just as much boys as other boys that are more masculine than him or more feminine than him, no matter how masculine or feminine he himself is, and likewise, for our daughters to know that they are just as much girls as other girls that are more masculine than her or more feminine than her, no matter how masculine or feminine she herself is. 1. **"***Boy*** things" are **NOT what makes someone a boy, and "Girl things" are** NOT what makes someone a girl. Despite how we live in a world where things such as dolls, trucks, lifting weights, nail painting, etc. can often be characterized as "boy things" or "girl things", one of the most important things we can teach children is that *none of those things make any boy or girl, into a boy or a girl*. A girl can play with dolls, and she'll still be as much of a girl as if she decided she doesn't like playing with dolls. She can also enjoy lifting weights or other "boy things" and she'll still be as much of a girl as she always was. The same is true for boys and whether or not they like "girl things" like dolls too. This is why even if your son ends up liking "girly things" or if your daughter likes "boy things", it's important for them to know that it's perfectly fine and possible for them to like whatever things are typically associated with the opposite sex, while still being the boy or girl that they originally are. >  (This point is actually a bit more nuanced and there are some limitations that will not appeal to some parents, this point will be expanded on later) 1. **It's completely normal to feel awkward and different from other boys or other girls.** Almost all people growing up will have times during their lives where they have to figure themselves out and how they fit within the rest of the world. Some people will have a harder time than others, but it's a near universal experience among all boys and girls. Being different from most boys does not make one a girl, as there are also many girls who are different from most girls. Being different from most girls does not make one a boy, as there are also many boys who are also different from other boys. It's important for your children to know that it's a normal part of growing up for nearly all boys and girls. 2. **Puberty and its physical changes on the body is terrible and awful for** **everyone****. Although this is typically seen as an awkward and uncomfortable subject for parents to talk to their kids about, it's arguably now more important to ever to start talking to them about puberty and the physical changes that every person goes through as they grow up, when the time comes. Pro-trans propaganda will try to tell them that said changes are terrifying and awful, like their voice changing, body hair growth, breast growth, and periods. And they'll try to tell your child that hating those things is a sign that they're trans and desire to be the opposite sex. This is why you as a parent need to let them know it's all part of growing up that every human, every boy and girl, has to go through. *Special note about boys and autogynephilia – **(Note: this is usually the** **#1 reason** **why** **boys**, typically **pubescent** **age or older, decide to identify as trans/girl)*** Although they will likely never admit to it, sometimes boys while developing their sexual libido towards girls, will have a strange sexual fetish/fascination with girls that they will believe that actually *being* a girl is as arousing as their boy brains believe to be by arousing themselves. (The same is true regarding some girls being aroused at the idea of becoming a boy as well, and all of the following points apply to said girls who have these feelings as well, although it's usually less common for girls to experience these feelings than boys) The first thing they should know is that these feelings are NOT a sign of homosexuality; in fact, it is actually a sign of the opposite: that they are heterosexual. Homosexuals do not feel arousal at themselves being the opposite sex, because homosexuals aren't attracted to the opposite sex in the first place. (Although it still may be possible they are bisexual and attracted to both sexes). The second and most important thing that they should know is that the feelings of arousal that they imagine of being the opposite sex are **NOT REAL**. Similar to the first point mentioned about how there's no such thing as "feeling like a girl/boy", there's no such thing as a constant sexual euphoric feeling of being a girl/boy either. No female is constantly aroused by themselves simply being female, or by thinking of their own respective female body parts (the same is true for males not being aroused at the state of being male either). As a mother or female family member, you can tell your male children/relatives (whom you suspect may be experiencing these feelings of autogynephilia) that you and every other female in existence do not feel aroused at your own bodies simply from being female. Although this should be obvious common sense, the impressions given by the likes of pornography and their brains' own imaginations create their own interpretations where they do legitimately believe that being female, having female body parts, wearing sexy female clothing, or imitating feminine behaviors, is in of itself an amazing sexual euphoria. Which is all the reason why it's important to get your children to realize that said sexual feelings of arousal imagining themselves as the opposite sex, are **not real** feelings that the opposite sex actually feels. Girls do not get turned on simply by being girls (not even lesbians do either). And these arousal feelings of imagining themselves being the opposite are also not self-evidence that that they are the opposite sex either. They actually prove the opposite. *For girls who hate femininity and being girls –* Probably the simplest way to avoid having them wanting to become a "boy" to escape femininity and womanhood, is to let them know that being female is only part of what they are. It doesn't define who they are. Though it may be a bit "feminist", at the end of the day, it's important to let girls know that being a girl should not stop them from being whoever they want to be. That being a girl and a woman can be as cool and amazing as however they themselves want to be, no matter whether they choose to be wives or mothers or whatever other role they decide is best for themselves, even if those other roles may not be like "what the other girls" usually go for. 1. **The narrative of transgender suicide is almost entirely lies and manipulation.** Should your children end up believing in the so-called trans-suicide narrative and lie pushed on to them and believe transitioning is the answer, it's important to let them know about the manipulation around it and everyone who espouses it. Don't let your child think that they're doomed to suicide for being trans, or for not admitting that they're trans, because they were told they were trans by adults or even other kids. *They decide for themselves who they are and how to live their lives*, not a bunch of people pretending to be their friends telling theme they have to follow their ways or be at risk for suicide. ### **The Flaw of Traditional Approaches – Gender nonconformity** Ideally, we hope for our boys to be "masculine" and for our girls to be "feminine" just as much as we want them to be happy and healthy. In the majority of cases, it is most likely true that most boys would naturally gravitate towards being "masculine" and most girls naturally gravitate toward being "feminine". When they don't, they are known as being *gender nonconforming,* and these minority of boys and girls are some of the most at-risk for transgender grooming. And the method to handle them require some acceptance of some difficult truths about the flaws of many "traditional" approaches to raising children. As the term implies, gender *nonconforming* refers to when individuals "don't conform to gender roles/stereotypes" in their interests, behaviors, etc. Males who exhibit feminine traits, such as Harry Styles wearing dresses (not conforming to normal male fashion expectations), or tomboy girls enjoy "masculine" activities like sports and camping (not conforming to normal female interest expectations). As mentioned before, their non-conformity makes them the perfect targets for transgender ideology to groom into believing that having interests or behaviors associated with the opposite sex, means they ARE the opposite sex and "transgender". Unfortunately, despite our own wants for our children, sometimes they will end up becoming ways which doesn't line up with our own expectations and ideals. Namely, sometimes we may get sons who like "girly" things, and daughters who like "boyish" things. In the event that some families end up getting some type of gender nonconforming children, say, a son who likes wearing dresses and pretending to be a princess, for many parents, they get alarmed. They worry if their son is homosexual. Now in modern times, they worry if their son will want to be a girl or if others will want to convince him to want to be a girl. When you have a boy (assume he's below the age of puberty\*\*) who likes pink and dresses and girly things, do you.. - A.) Tell him to stop being girly and to man up? - B.) Tell him that it proves he is actually a girl on the inside? - C.) Tell him that he can decide for himself whatever he likes and be himself? "Traditional" ideology of parenting would most likely suggest A.) Transgender ideology would tell them B.) **The answer that I would personally recommend is something like C.)** (the conversation about autogynephilia is something that may be required if they are pubescent and a boy) >  A rather reckless assumption that people tend to make, is that transgenderism can be beaten with "traditional" teachings, like that of Christian or conservative households. "Teach your boys to be masculine/men" and such similar mantras. Unfortunately, there are also many trans stories from kids who come from conservative, traditional, evangelical Christian backgrounds as well The problem is that while such traditional approaches such as "Be a man" or "You can't do that, that's for girls", may work for most boys innately inclined to be masculine, or girls inclined to be feminine, it does NOT work as well for the gender nonconforming minority of them who aren't. And while traditional ways may have worked "in the past", the problem is that NOW in the present, transgender ideology knows how to beat traditional logic and target those gender nonconforming children to its own side. Ironically, this is because transgender ideology is almost near identical to that of "traditional" logic of gender, and even derives from it. - Traditional gender logic = "Only girls are supposed to cross their legs" - Transgender logic = "Crossing legs is proof of being a girl" In the previously shown example with the parents telling him "you can't cross your legs, because that's for girls", transgender ideology exploits this by saying that him wanting to cross his legs proves that he IS a girl (in the "wrong body"). Naturally, he wants to do what he wants to do, and he's certainly not going to be inclined to listen to the side telling him that he can't, for a reason that doesn't make sense to him. Trying to force "traditional" ways on such gender nonconforming children can sometimes end up in **resentment and disenfranchisement** for such children and actually **push them towards transgender ideology and its "welcoming" arms**. Although this will not be seen as ideal or even desirable for many parents, in a scenario such as this one, I would probably LET them do as they desire, and let them know that they can do it without being the opposite sex. Yes, that means that if they believe they like things like dresses and other various girly things, I would personally take a rather liberal approach and let him do as he pleases. However, like mentioned in previous sections, I would be sure to tell him that he does not have to be a girl to like "girl things", *and that liking girl things doesn't make him into a girl, and that he can still be a wonderful boy no matter what he likes to do, girly or otherwise*. **No matter HOW MUCH other people try to tell him that doing those things makes him into a girl**. One thing that needs to be clarified: This is NOT advocating for anyone to purposely push and force opposite-gendered characteristics. It is not advocating for boys to have "feminine" behaviors and interests, nor for girls to have "masculine" behaviors and interests. This is referring to when they end up becoming as such and having qualities and interests associated with the opposite sex due to random circumstance, and how I believe is the best way to approach it to avoid having them being convinced they're the opposite sex by trans-ideology. Many people will undoubtedly find such an approach to be counter-intuitive and probably even undesirable. "*You're telling me that I'm supposed to just let my son be girly and not try and raise him to be a man?!*" Not exactly. But "let kids like and be however they want" can be interpreted that way when they sometimes decide they want to be a way that doesn't align with how we want them to be. One could also take an overly-exaggerated form of this argument with something like "*Oh, so if my children want to be drug dealers, then I should just let them do what they want and be drug dealers?!*" Again, no. The purpose of this guide is NOT how to teach your sons to be masculine or your daughters to be feminine. This guide has no control over whether or not your children become gender nonconforming, whether your son decides he likes being "feminine", or if your daughter decides she likes being "masculine". The purpose of this guide IS to lay out the best ways to have them avoid being groomed by transgender ideology into them wanting or believing themselves to be the opposite sex, if they were to end up becoming gender nonconforming. Nobody has any real control over whether their son likes dresses and sitting with his legs crossed, and it may not be the ideal masculine son that most people want. But having a "feminine" son who at least thinks of himself and realizes he's a boy, is still better than one trying to pursue being a "girl" to allow himself to do "girly" things (because he believed that "only girls can do the things he wants to do"). ## **Final Thoughts** Transgender ideology is something that is here to stay. Even if it stops becoming popular or widely accepted in mainstream culture, and perhaps even mocked (as it rightfully should be), it will always still exist from now and into the future. Even if all sources of it were to be heavily censored, it cannot be undone out of existence any more than any other ideology. Some of the solutions are as simple as talking to your kids and asking why they think the way they do. Some of the solutions aren't as simple as many people think, like forcing heaps of "tradition" on to them and sometimes ironically accidentally pushing them to the side of transgender ideology. No matter how fallacious and factually incorrect the ideology may be, at the end of the day, people are still believing in it, and children are falling for it too. But since it can't be undone out of existence by mere primitive methods of censorship, it must be defeated from an ideological standpoint, now and possibly forever even after it may be unpopular. *From A Silent Person Acting Greatly* **Disclaimer:** I am not a PhD or MD and nothing written can be considered as professional advice.